Far wiser and wittier folk than me have said far wiser and wittier things than I’m capable of. Here are some of them.

We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief requirements of life, when all that we need to make us really happy is something to be enthusiastic about.
Charles Kingsley, 1819-1875

If you want awe, look at the reflection into the future and the past that the Hubble telescope provides, look at what Stephen Hawking has discovered about the extraordinary majesty of this universe. The argument of design or original cause is too paltry to take account of anything so splendid and so various.
Christopher Hitchens, 1949-2011

Nothing happens until something moves.
Albert Einstein, 1879-1955

Two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I am not yet sure about the universe.
Albert Einstein, 1879-1955

A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it.
Albert Einstein, 1879-1955

If we are going to teach creation science as an alternative to evolution, then we should also teach the stork theory as an alternative to biological reproduction.
Judith Hayes, 1945-2012

Men rarely, if ever, dream up a god superior to themselves. Most gods have the manners and morals of a spoiled child.
Robert A. Heinlein, 1907-1988

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
Douglas Adams, 1952-2001

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.
Douglas Adams, 1952-2001

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
Douglas Adams, 1952-2001

This must be Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.
Douglas Adams, 1952-2001

The impossible often has a kind of integrity which the merely improbable lacks.
Douglas Adams, 1952-2001

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
Oscar Wilde, 1854-1900

Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.
Oscar Wilde, 1854-1900

No great artist ever sees things as they really are. If he did, he would cease to be an artist.
Oscar Wilde, 1854-1900

The truth is rarely pure and never simple.
Oscar Wilde, 1854-1900

A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
George Bernard Shaw, 1856-1950

People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.
George Bernard Shaw, 1856-1950

The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.
George Bernard Shaw, 1856-1950

People like Coldplay and voted for the Nazis. You can’t trust people.
Super Hans from “Peep Show”, (fictional character)

Emotions are dumb and should be hated!
Bender from “Futurama”, (fictional character)

Well, thanks to the Internet I’m now bored with sex.
Fry from “Futurama”, (fictional character)

I suppose it is technically possible, although I am already in my pajamas.
Professor Farnsworth from “Futurama”, (fictional character)

Friends, help! A guinea pig tricked me!
Dr. Zoidberg from “Futurama”, (fictional character)

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